Cloaked Critic Reviews Dumbo

!!!!SPOILER ALERT!!!!

I'm sure we're all very familiar with "Dumbo", the fourth animated Disney classic released in 1941.  After the financial losses of "Fantasia", Dumbo was produced to recoup those losses. Simplicity was meant to be the main goal, and at a mere 64 minutes, the goal was certainly achieved as this remains, to date, one of Disney's shortest animated feature films. The whole movie is really just an extended version of certain Disney shorts like "The Ugly Duckling", "Elmer Elephant", and "Lambert the Sheepish Lion". This would also explain why both Dumbo and his mother are mostly mute throughout the film, because it would have demanded more time, work, and most importantly, money to create the lip-sync animation for both characters, and they would have also needed to hire two additional voice actors to provide their voices. Say what you will of "Dumbo", but in my own personal opinion, "Dumbo" is honestly one of Disney's more boring stories; somewhat ironic as the movie was apparently based off of a story made for a prototype novelty toy called a "Roll-A-Book".

First off, we should definitely thank Disney for confusing the young minds of millions of kids (including myself) as to where babies come from. The very beginning of this movie depicts Dumbo's birth being made possible by a stork delivery service. For some reason, the imagery of the stork delivering babies was a common fantasy trope in cartoons back then. This fairytale has long faded out of fashion over the decades, but I'm still left to wonder where the hell this concept even came from. I mean where do the babies come from before the storks deliver them? Talk about a weird fantasy trope.

Besides the crow scene which I enjoy because of its jovial nature, my only other favorite part of this movie are the Pink Elephants. I thoroughly enjoy this sequence as it is a wonderful example of the sheer power of animation. Light, color, music, and whimsical designs and shapes are put together to turn the simple concept of "pink elephants" into a surreal nightmarish dance of fanciful wonder. The whole scene is an absolute work of art. It's poetry of madness and imagination in splendorous color set to a catchy upbeat tune. It's actually scenes like this that made me fall in love with animation in the first place.

This movie often gets blasted by the political-correctness police for its racial stereotypes; scenes featuring depictions of Blacks such as the Roustabouts song and the crows are frequently condemned as racist, but I swear if I hear one more person call the crows in this movie racist I'm going to scream! I've personally found that a lot of the people quick to throw around the "R" word in reality don't have any damn idea what real racism even is. There's a fine line between something being stereotypical and something being truly racist. It's only racist if it is purposefully meant to offend and/or defame a specific group of people. Only when there is obvious malicious intent directed toward a particular ethnic group is it actually racist; if there is no malicious intent then it's just stereotypical, and even then it's still debatable as to just how stereotypical the crows really are. First of all, most of the crows are voiced by African-American actors; all of whom members of the all-black Hall Johnson Choir. Secondly, many people have disputed the racist claim, stating that the crows form the majority of the characters who are actually sympathetic to Dumbo. They are also not ignorant as many people claim, but carefree fun-loving spirits who value self-confidence and live in accordance to their own free will...not an uncommon trope in fantasy movies. The claim of their so-called ignorance is even further disproven by their song, "When I See An Elephant Fly" which incorporates intricate clever wordplay, and their playful taunting is more intended to mock Timothy than Dumbo's ears. Plus they do ultimately help Dumbo and Timothy; a fact worth noting, as without their help Dumbo never would have discovered that he could fly and would have likely died in that bogus high-diving act the circus forced him to perform.

Of course honestly, racial stereotypes are the least of this movie's problems. Speaking personally, aside from the "Pink Elephants" sequence, the crows are really the only entertaining part of this story, because everything else that isn't mellow and generally boring is just emotionally-scarring. I mean this is a story about a poor baby elephant who is alienated, abused, and treated like total shit just because he has a physical deformity. He's even treated poorly by his own kind! The bitchy female elephants in this movie are FAR more offensive than the crows, in my opinion. After all, I didn't want to jump in the movie and shoot the crows with an elephant gun! They are short-sighted mean-spirited bigoted gossiping hags who are unjustly cruel to Dumbo for no reason beyond him being physically-deformed. The movie sends a terrible message too, because instead of him eventually being accepted and loved for his personality he ends up being accepted as a freak of nature and a means of entertainment. In other words, he becomes accepted for being a freak with big ears who can fly! Disney's basically saying that fame and popularity equals love and acceptance; that all you need to be successful in life is to be famous. This is of course far from the truth. If it was true, then the celebrity assholes in Hollywood would be the happiest motherfuckers on the planet...and don't even get me started on the shameful depictions of abuse and forced labor these poor circus animals are subjected to.

I suspect it's just an odd coincidence, but one thing I noticed after a little contemplation is that there are actually a couple of parallels between Dumbo and Disney's other feature film, "Pinocchio". In fact, the parallels are significant enough for me to make the argument that Pinocchio and Dumbo are intrinsically the same character. Both of them have best friends who act as a type of big-brother figure to them, which of course is very ironic as in both cases their "big brother" also happens to be a fraction of their size. They are both clumsy and awkward, with a tendency of tripping themselves up. They also appear to both have similar facial features. It's not immediately noticable because of the obvious difference in species, but both Pinocchio and Dumbo have the same big blue eyes, and wear a similarly shaped hat...the facial similarities grow slightly more obvious whenever Pinocchio's nose grows and after he gets donkey ears. They also share a very innocent and trusting nature making them both very impressionable. However this is more problematic for Pinocchio than Dumbo as Dumbo actually listens to his buddy, while Pinocchio is more inclined to ditch Jiminy to act upon whatever fool idea pops into his head, so I guess you could say the similarities stop there.

It's appalling to think that they're really planning on making a live-action version of this movie. As freakin' cartoonish and fanciful as this movie is you just know any live-action adaptation is going to be a mega load of horse shit! Haven't these assholes learned anything from similar failures?! Did they forget how abysmal other live-action adaptations of cartoon series and films have been? Live-action Garfield, Scooby-Doo, and Yogi Bear should serve as reminders of why you don't try this shit! THEY ALWAYS SUCK!!! Seriously, What's Next?! A LIVE-ACTION ADAPTATION OF THE FUCKIN' LION KING?!!!!!

So what more can be said? "Dumbo" is either a film that you love or that you hate...I don't really hate it, but then I don't really love it that much either. As I mentioned before, this movie is really just boring to me, and that which isn't boring is emotionally-disturbing. It's one of those kids' movies I found more bittersweet than fun. There is only two reasons I watch it, and that's because I love the Pink Elephants and crows so much; other than that this movie's practically mirthless...might as well be watching "Oliver Twist". Of course as much as I hate/like it, I still don't want to see it besmirched by a terrible live-action adaptation. Seriously...FUCK YOU, DISNEY!!! Fuck you and your brainless tasteless unoriginal live-action bullshit!!

...and to think I thought it was bad when they were only making fuckin' 3D movies!